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Shouldn’t I Be Breathing Easier Now? June 15, 2004

Ok. I admit it. I’ve gone from ignoring my blog to not being able to shut up on it. I’m pretty sure it’s due to the large amount of nervous energy that is currently bottled up inside me. A lot of things that were causing me stress in this post have been resolved, at least partially, but I’m not feeling that much better.

I called the administrator lady that works in my husband’s doctor’s office this afternoon to follow up on getting the whole sperm cryopreservation thing figured out. She had me hold to speak to the actual doctor. This was a relief. We generally have much better success getting things communicated when skipping the middleman (or middlelady as the case may be). Anyway, I let the doctor know that the facility doing the cryopreservation needed an order from his office and a referral if he was going to order any tests. He said he would call the facility directly and get things set up. A little while later the administrator lady called me back to let me know things were all set to go.

My husband contacted our leasing office about our lease renewal. As a result, they are preparing a new lease that will be ready for us to sign by Saturday.

I emailed the ebay seller of the phones that I have yet to receive, because I was getting nervous after reading his new negative feedbacks. He emailed me back shortly thereafter to let me know that the phones had not shipped yet due to an oversight on his part. He apologized and promised to send them out first thing today priority mail.

My little brush with angular cheilitis has an end in sight. I think. It’s getting better thanks to some good old hydrocortisone applications. Thanks google for pointing me to a site that suggested this treatment. I don’t think I would have thought to use it otherwise.

Well, as you can see things are working out, at least for the time being. So why am I still sitting here curled up in a little ball totally stressing out? I’m sure it has something to do with the whole surgery thing. This one day (next Monday) will determine our whole baby-making future. I’m terrified. First and foremost, I want my wonderful hubby to be ok. Surgery is always a scary proposition. Secondly, I just want to know where we go from here. It’s just so stressful not knowing what the next step is. Will the surgery work, and we’ll actually be able to get to start “trying” again? Will the doctor be unable to complete the reconstruction due to a secondary obstruction, and we’ll have to go straight to IVF? Will the surgery only seemingly be a success, and we’ll have to turn to IVF after “trying” without success for 6-12 months? God, I wish I knew. The best I’ve come up with is just to hold my hubby tight and try to make it until Monday.

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