Back in Action July 26, 2004
It felt weird ignoring my blog this weekend. I didn’t have much down time, and even when I did, there were people lurking in my apartment. It’s not like they were strangers or anything, but it made me realize how protective I am of my blog and the other infertility blogs I read. It’s like a private little world, that I have no interest in sharing with my relatives.
We had a good time this weekend, but I’m worn out. We went to the Astros game on Friday night (they lost), the Galleria, various other big city stores, and even to a movie (The Bourne Supremacy) Saturday night. The last time my husband and I went to a movie in a theater was in South Bend about a year and a half ago. I guess we should go more, but we’re Netflix junkies. I do have to say that the movie theater we went to on Saturday was the nicest one I’ve ever been to with the plushest seats ever.
Well, our RE consult is on Wednesday, and I’m getting nervous already. I’ve known it was coming, but it just makes this whole IVF thing so real. I guess I’ve just hoped that it wouldn’t come to that.
When my husband and I first started trying to get pregnant, I had no doubts that it would happen right away. My mom had made it very clear that she and my dad were super fertile. My brother and I are only a year and a half apart, and my youngest brother was a surprise. My husband’s parents are obviously extremely fertile as well as evidenced by the fact that my hubby was an “oops” baby. We were young and never had any doubt that we’d have the same luck.
When my husband was diagnosed with azoospermia (zero sperm count) this past November after we’d been trying to get pregnant for almost 2 years, I still had hope that we’d avoid IVF. Given the fact that we suspected that my husband’s azoospermia was caused by the hernia surgery he had as a young child, we had high hopes that it could be corrected surgically. We were right about the cause and even the surgery part. My hubby’s urologist told us that the last man he operated on with the same condition, had his wife pregnant within 6 months of the surgery. We figured, we could have the same. My husband had the surgery last month, and it was not successful due to the extent of the blockages, so here we are facing IVF w/ICSI. It’s the only option we have left in order to have a biological child.
There are a lot of couples diagnosed with azoospermia who bypass IVF and jump straight to IUI with donor sperm. While this would be a much less costly proposition (by about $12 or 13K), we don’t feel like this is the right move for us. We want to try IVF first, while we’re young and have semi-good odds. If that doesn’t work for us, we feel that adoption is the right choice for us. I know that I would get to experience pregnancy with donor sperm IUI, but right now I’m in the place where I want my husband and I to have an equal biological connection. Either all or none.
- I just read that back, and I guess that’s not really true. I honestly wouldn’t mind using donor eggs (not that it would solve our fertility problems) but I don’t want my husband to lose the biological connection. I want to have his baby.
I guess I should compile all the questions I have for our RE, and I have lots. I’ve been scribbling them down when they pop into my head, but I need to get them into some kind of organized and legible list. I’m sure I’m going to annoy the heck out of my RE, but I like to know exactly what I’m getting into.
- Posted in : What? No sperm? The pre IVF days, various other ramblings
- Author : amanda
Comments»
I know what you mean about the blogs being a part of a private world. I have not told anyone about the blog I write or the ones I read. My poor husband is wondering, I think, why I have been glued to my laptop lately! :)
Good luck with your RE consult.
Nina
(http://pictureperfect.typepad.com/one_good_egg/)
Amanda, I understand about your feelings of being protective with your blog. I’m the same way. I have not told many of our friends or relatives. Only my sisters and one of L.’s cousin know (the people who I felt wouldn’t judge or criticize me.) This blogosphere world provides me comfort and I’d like to keep it that way for a while.
As for your RE appt., I hope you find out everything that you want to know. Making a list is a great idea. Some docs will rush through it so make sure you ask about EVERYTHING that you are curious about. IVF is such a huge step. I know no one thinks they will ever get to do that (me
included.) Best of luck with that.
I also understand about the need to have your husband’s biological children. When you have someone so incredible in your life, you just can’t imagine having a baby not related to them. But I know for some people, that is their only option, and that is still better than not having any at all.