Do Not Try This At Home September 6, 2005
Holy crap. Today sucked. Yesterday I started bleeding, and today the wrath hit. Of course, my body decided to miscarry while one dose of Vicodin was wearing off and the next had yet to kick in. Oh, my.
I really don’t get why people say that a miscarriage is like a crampy period. That was true for my chemical, but miscarrying at 8.5 weeks is another story all together. I was expecting some pain, but I could have never imagined what it was really going to be like.
It was so much more than cramps. Those mother fuckers were contractions. I alternated between rocking back and forth on the toilet and writhing in pain on the bathroom floor. It was so bad.
After so much of that hell that I really didn’t think I was going to make it, I finally passed the sac. It was so much bigger than I expected. Scary stuff.
I know one thing. I will never go through that again. If I ever have the misfortune of miscarrying again (please, oh please, don’t let that happen) I will be signing up for a D&C in a heartbeat. This crap is hard enough without having to survive utter agony.
I think the worst is behind me now, though. I’m doing so much better now. Of course, I’m doped up on Vicodin, thank goodness, but it’s still obvious that my body is happy to be done with the expelling portion of the event.
Hopefully my body did its job completely. It sure as hell better have after all of that. I’ll have to go back and have betas done to watch my levels drop, so that should be fun. I’m just hoping that I’ve survived the worst of it. I really, really don’t want to experience any more of that any time soon.
- Posted in : IVF Part 5: IVF #3, Limboland: the aftermath of IVF Part 5, various other ramblings
- Author : amanda
Comments»
Oh sweetheart, (yes, you don’t know me, I hope you don’t mind me calling you that)
I’m sorry that you had to go through that.
Thinking of you.
Yeah it tends to suck. I’ve lost mine EARLY EARLY so I’ve never gotten that far, but I helped a friend through one just after 12 weeks. I can tell you it isn’t a trip. It gets harder and more and more like labor the farther along you get (or so I’ve been told since she has lost several and has two kids and is a doula).
I guess I can say how “lucky” I am to lose mine early since I can avoid that pain. Hahahah, yeah lucky to lose a baby. That’s so wrong on so many many levels. (hear sarcasm)
I’m SO sorry you’ve had to go through this. I really wanted you to succeed this time.
Oh, Amanda,
I’m so sorry you had to go through that on top of everything else. Thinking of you and hoping you get a good night’s sleep full of sweet dreams tonight.
I hope the worst is over. You’re a stronger woman than I. The thought of even seeing the sac had me signing up for the D&C in a heartbeat.
That is horrible! I am so, so sorry, and I know how much it sucks. XOXOXOXO
Ohhhh Amanda. I am so, so sorry.
I simply cannot imagine.
I love you and I care. I wish I could hug you.
That was the experience I had with my first, and sadly, my husband was out of town. He refused all business trips since because he knew I was traumatized by going through that at night alone.
I keep repeating that I’m so sorry, but it’s true. I hope this means you’re on the way to recovery, whatever that means.
God that’s awful Amanda, i’m so sorry. Hope you feel you are on your way to healing.
Oh, Amanda, how awful. I’m so sorry it had to be so painful and frightening for you, and I hope that was the end of it — the physical part, at least. You’re in my thoughts.
God, that sounded terrible. I’m sorry you had to go through that on top of everything else. I hope you’re feeling better physically.
What a nightmare. My miscarriage was a D&C, so I don’t really know what its like to have to go through all that, but I’m so sorry you had to go through it.
Bless your heart! So not fair!!
So sorry honey, so sorry.
Oh my God, that sounds so awful. I’m so glad that the worst is over. Take care.
I’m so sorry. I know it hurts like hell, not to mention the whole horror aspect of it. I always go for the D&C because of that too, and the sooner the better.
I’m thinking of you. So much.
Amanda I am so sorry for the pain you have had to go through both physically and emotionally. You are always in my thoughts!
You are much stronger than I. When I miscarried at 9 weeks i opted for the d&C. And after reading your story I know I would never have been able to go through what you did. You are so strong!!!
Oh Amanda! I am so sorry. I really hope that the worst is over for you.
You are in my thoughts.
I am so very sorry, sweetie. Thinking of you.
I’m sorry it was so hard for you. I never would have suggested the misoprostol(not that you used it) if I’d thought it was going to be so hard on you. I hope you weren’t alone……..
OMG, Amanda, I should’ve warned you about that. My miscarriage was diagnosed at 8 weeks 4 days and happened at 9 weeks. It was the most physically painful thing I’ve been through. It was exactly like what I would imagine labor to be. I cried and rocked and sat on the toilet and rocked. It was awful. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.
I’m so sorry – none of this has been fair. I truly hope this is the worst you’ll have to endure. Thank you for being open about it – hopefully it will help others. (I’m always looking for silver linings.)
You sound so strong.
So sorry you had to go through this. Thinking of you.
gentle hugs
Shit amanda, I’m so sorry you had to go through that. It sounds absolutely horrible.