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The Calm Could Only Last So Long May 26, 2006

I’ve been doing pretty well the past few days. I’ve haven’t had another freakout. I’ve just been doing my best to hang in there until tomorrow. Now that beta #3 is so close, however, I’m getting nervous again.

I know the anxiety is flowing through my body whether I try to keep it at bay or not. Last night I dreamt that there was blood on the toilet paper. There hasn’t been (knock on wood) but it just goes to show where my brain is right now.

It’s going to be hard if I get bad news tomorrow. Aside from the obvious reasons, I won’t be able to crawl into a hole immediately. We’re making the drive over to my parent’s house tonight for a family get together this weekend. It’s been a year and a half since my two brothers, their significant others, my parents, and Dan and I have all been together at the same place at the same time.

This weekend has been planned for a long time, and I can’t exactly blow them off. So, I’ll just have to suck it up for a while if tomorrow’s phone call brings bad news. Maybe I’ll bring Vicodin along with me. Hey, you can’t say I don’t plan ahead.

I know that things could go either way tomorrow. I know what I’m hoping so much for, but I also know what kind of luck I have. I just hope I get a break this time around. I’m feeling overdue.

Comments»

1. zhl - May 26, 2006

Oh, Amanda, I’m thinking the best for you and crossing anything I can think of. I’ll be out away from the Internets again this weekend (I’ll actually be in your neck of the woods with my husband’s family) so I’ll miss your update but I hope to come back on Monday to your good news.

You will be in my thoughts all weekend. And yes, you are more than due for good luck. Furiously knocking wood.

2. mm - May 26, 2006

Damn right you’re overdue, my friend. I’ll be thinking of you this wknd.

3. Soralis - May 26, 2006

Wishing you wonderful news and a good weekend.

Take care

4. Staci - May 26, 2006

You are long overdue. I’ll be thinking of you this weekend and hoping for only good news.

5. Brooklyn Girl - May 26, 2006

You ARE overdue. It sucks that you can’t opt out of the family event–that sort of stuff always led to furtive tears in closets or bathrooms for me. Good times.

Thinking of you.

6. Lala - May 26, 2006

I know I’m a bad commenter but I’ve been rooting for you and I’ll be thinking of you this weekend.
Lala – reading and hoping from afar

7. Menita - May 26, 2006

Overdue? Yep, a smidge.
Oh it sucks about the family get-together, either way.
Maybe you can stop for a sample size tequila bottle at the liquor store? You’re going to need it either way. You ARE allowed a small swig if the news is good, and if it isn’t, you can down the while thing.
Here’s hoping you just need that small swig.

8. Pamplemousse - May 26, 2006

Thinking of you, sweetie. You never know, you just might have a fabulous weekend!!!

9. Portlairge - May 26, 2006

Have a lovely weekend. Thinking good thoughts for tomorrow’s number.

10. projgen - May 26, 2006

I hope you have a fabulous weekend, starting with a good, long overdue, happy phone call. Please may it be so for you.

11. Meri-ann - May 26, 2006

Oh yes you are wayyyyyyyy overdue babe- enjoy your weekend and here’s only good news coming your way….

12. Linda - May 26, 2006

I pray that your phone call brings you great, wonderous news!

13. Sarah - May 26, 2006

Damn right you are due for some good news!! Have a wonderful time with your family and I will be thinking of you. Take care.

14. Beth - May 26, 2006

Overdue without a doubt. Hoping only good news finds you! Enjoy your time with your family.

15. Leggy - May 26, 2006

Definitely overdue. I so hope the news is good.

16. Kimmer - May 26, 2006

Way OVERDUE… I agree. Thinking of you and praying you have some good news coming!

17. In Due Time - May 26, 2006

Incase I don’t get on before you leave for tomorrow…I am hoping nad praying for good news for you sweetie. Super Big Hugs!

18. Dee - May 26, 2006

Wishing you a safe trip tomorrow and a beautiful number. Enjoy your weekend and know that this Florida girl will be thinking of you and Dan across the miles.

19. Jennie - May 26, 2006

very overdue,
fingers crossed = check
toes crossed = check
eyes crossed = kechc

thinking of you lovely and hoping this time you get great news.

20. Kath - May 27, 2006

Dear Amanda, yes, terribly overdue. I’m thinking of you and hoping to heck that Vicodin stays in your purse for the next, uh, year or so.

Hoping hoping hoping for you and Dan.

21. beagle - May 27, 2006

I do hope you get a break this time around as well. Good Luck! I hope the family gathering is a joyous event rather than something to endure. May it be good news today!

22. Mary Scarlet - May 27, 2006

You are absolutely due, my dear. Hoping for great news today.

23. BrendaS - May 27, 2006

Patiently (yeah right) waiting for today’s number. And praying it’s the news you’ve waited so long for.

24. JenH - May 27, 2006

Egads, refresh, refresh, refresh…

So hoping for superdeeduper news. Would settle for merely wonderful.

25. Menita - May 27, 2006

Thinking of you.