What Now? July 20, 2008
You know you’re a sucky blogger when people leave comments on your last post politely reminding you that you haven’t posted in forever. I guess I have no real excuse. Adam keeps me very busy these days, but I know it’s more than that that’s kept me from my blog the past couple of months.
I guess the older Adam gets (he’s 18 months now!) the further away I get from the me that I picture as the author of this blog. I don’t know if that makes sense, but I’m finding myself gaining at least some closure on the whole infertility subject. Don’t get me wrong, I am forever changed by what we went through. I’m not the same person I was before I jabbed myself with a needle. I’m not the same kind of mom I would have been without going through IVF hell. The more I spend time with Adam, though, the more my heart is healed. I don’t want to think about infertility hell and the person I was while in it on a daily basis anymore.
I don’t really know what that means for this blog. Obviously I suck as a “mommy blogger.” I never intended to be one. And it’s not like we’re going to be jumping back in the IVF ring again anytime soon, or ever. So, where does that leave me?
I do know that there are some things that I’d like to get out of my head and onto “paper.” I’ve been meaning to devote a post to breastfeeding for the longest time. It’s important to me to do at least that. Before Adam was born I wasn’t even sure how long we’d last. And those first couple of months made me wonder even more. Well, here we are at a year and a half and still going strong, and I think that is worth a post or two. So, maybe I’ll get around to that at some point.
There are other things that come to mind when I think about what I could blog about. Like how things are so different than I expected them to be. I’m so much more of an AP kind of parent that I ever imagined.
I know there is stuff I can blog about. I guess I just need to figure out if I have the motivation to do so anymore. I’ll leave ya with a recent pic of our little man until I can figure out what the heck I’m doing here.
