Can Anyone Recommend a Good Steam Cleaner? July 28, 2004
Because I’m pretty sure my head exploded all over my beige carpet this morning. I called the RE’s office first thing to make sure Nurse A had faxed the rest of my records yesterday afternoon. Surprise, surprise, she hadn’t. I called back my OBGYN’s office once again and spoke to Nurse A. I explained that my appointment was in a few hours, and she said she would fax them this morning. She wasn’t going to fool me again with that one, so I suggested that I just come pick them up instead. I figured that was the only way that I could make sure ALL of my records got to the RE’s office.
So, I showed up at the OBGYN’s office, and they let Nurse A know I was there. She came to the waiting room shortly thereafter and handed me some copies. I took a quick look to make sure they were all there, and sure enough my HSG record was not included. I followed her to the back and made sure I got copies of everything. It sure was a pain getting all of those records, but I feel better now that I actually have copies in my possession.
Well, I better go make copies of those prized records before I leave in half an hour to go to our appointment. Thank you girls for your well wishes. It means a lot to me.
My Head’s About to Explode July 27, 2004
Why is it so hard to get your medical records transferred to a new doctor? I signed the request to have all of my lab results faxed to our new RE during my last appointment with my OBGYN on the 15th. You would think that would be plenty of time to get it done before our appointment tomorrow. Oh, no.
When the RE’s office called yesterday afternoon to confirm my appointment, I asked if they had received my records. They told me they had not. I called my OBGYN’s office and was told that I would have to speak to nurse A, and they would have her call me back. I wasn’t surprised when I did not receive said phone call. So, I called back this morning, and nurse A said she had already faxed my records a while back. I let her know that they had not been received by the RE’s office, so she said she would fax them again. I just called the RE’s office to make sure they got them this time, and they had, but only my blood and culture results from my last appointment. No records of my pap, HSG, or previous blood tests. UGH! I called back nurse A and she is supposedly going to fax those now. I guess I’ll have to call back the RE’s office at some point to make sure they finally have it all. So frustrating.
I’m getting nervous. Our appointment tomorrow just makes this so REAL. I’ve been preparing myself for the possibility of IVF since last November, but it’s still hard to face. My anal-retentive self is all prepared. My list of questions is printed out, my husband’s records are photocopied (his nurse actually cooperates with me), I’ve got a map and directions printed, and I’ve assembled it all in a nice binder. My worrisome, anxious self is a little less prepared, however. I’m just glad my husband will be able to get away from work in order to come with me. I’m sure he’ll do his best to keep me sane.
Back in Action July 26, 2004
It felt weird ignoring my blog this weekend. I didn’t have much down time, and even when I did, there were people lurking in my apartment. It’s not like they were strangers or anything, but it made me realize how protective I am of my blog and the other infertility blogs I read. It’s like a private little world, that I have no interest in sharing with my relatives.
We had a good time this weekend, but I’m worn out. We went to the Astros game on Friday night (they lost), the Galleria, various other big city stores, and even to a movie (The Bourne Supremacy) Saturday night. The last time my husband and I went to a movie in a theater was in South Bend about a year and a half ago. I guess we should go more, but we’re Netflix junkies. I do have to say that the movie theater we went to on Saturday was the nicest one I’ve ever been to with the plushest seats ever.
Well, our RE consult is on Wednesday, and I’m getting nervous already. I’ve known it was coming, but it just makes this whole IVF thing so real. I guess I’ve just hoped that it wouldn’t come to that.
When my husband and I first started trying to get pregnant, I had no doubts that it would happen right away. My mom had made it very clear that she and my dad were super fertile. My brother and I are only a year and a half apart, and my youngest brother was a surprise. My husband’s parents are obviously extremely fertile as well as evidenced by the fact that my hubby was an “oops” baby. We were young and never had any doubt that we’d have the same luck.
When my husband was diagnosed with azoospermia (zero sperm count) this past November after we’d been trying to get pregnant for almost 2 years, I still had hope that we’d avoid IVF. Given the fact that we suspected that my husband’s azoospermia was caused by the hernia surgery he had as a young child, we had high hopes that it could be corrected surgically. We were right about the cause and even the surgery part. My hubby’s urologist told us that the last man he operated on with the same condition, had his wife pregnant within 6 months of the surgery. We figured, we could have the same. My husband had the surgery last month, and it was not successful due to the extent of the blockages, so here we are facing IVF w/ICSI. It’s the only option we have left in order to have a biological child.
There are a lot of couples diagnosed with azoospermia who bypass IVF and jump straight to IUI with donor sperm. While this would be a much less costly proposition (by about $12 or 13K), we don’t feel like this is the right move for us. We want to try IVF first, while we’re young and have semi-good odds. If that doesn’t work for us, we feel that adoption is the right choice for us. I know that I would get to experience pregnancy with donor sperm IUI, but right now I’m in the place where I want my husband and I to have an equal biological connection. Either all or none.
– I just read that back, and I guess that’s not really true. I honestly wouldn’t mind using donor eggs (not that it would solve our fertility problems) but I don’t want my husband to lose the biological connection. I want to have his baby.
I guess I should compile all the questions I have for our RE, and I have lots. I’ve been scribbling them down when they pop into my head, but I need to get them into some kind of organized and legible list. I’m sure I’m going to annoy the heck out of my RE, but I like to know exactly what I’m getting into.
All Negative July 20, 2004
I just called and got my husband’s blood test results. They’re all negative, and that’s a good thing. They’re the kind of tests where you want to have a negative result- HIV, hepatitis, etc. The nurse is going to mail me a copy, so I can add it to my collection of stuff to bring to our IVF consult next week. Getting those results officially concludes the medical intervention part in all this trying to conceive business for my husband. He’s been through enough. It’s time for my part now.
Wow July 16, 2004
I just got the statement from the hospital for my husband’s surgery. Thank goodness we have insurance, because the total bill was over $20,000. There’s no way we could have afforded to pay for that and then turn around and pay $15,000 for IVF. We pay a lot for our insurance, and it totally sucks that it doesn’t cover IVF, but I guess we’ve gotten our money’s worth so far. I would have hated to fork out $20K for a surgery that did not work.
Bloodletting July 15, 2004
I’m back from my appointment with my OBGYN. I had some oh so fun cultures taken (gotta love that speculum) and 5 vials of blood drawn. These test results will all be forwarded (hopefully) to my soon to be RE (reproductive endocrinologist) before our consult on the 28th. I’ll have to have a couple more tests done on day 3 of my cycle and a sonohystogram at some point, but hopefully that should be it for the pretesting for IVF.
Going to the OBGYN was not that fun of an experience. Besides the whole poking around business, there were tons of big bellied pregnant women in the waiting room who sole purpose, I assume, was to remind me that I was not pregnant. Then when I got in the exam room, the nurse began asking the standard questions:
“When was the first day of your last menstrual period?”
“Are you taking any medications?”
“Any previous pregnancies?” Hello! Look at my chart. I’m here for INfertility. Fun times.
Progress July 13, 2004
We’re making progress on a couple of fronts. Salvador ate a little bit of canned food last night and ate 6 bite sized pieces of ham this morning. He’s taking all of his medicine like a champ and is being the big sweetheart that we know and love. We should get his biopsy results back today, so hopefully that will bring good news.
My husband finally got his blood drawn to test for all of those lovely infectious diseases they make you test for before you can start IVF. I’m glad that was the last poking and prodding he’ll have to endure. He’s been through his fair share. Now it’s my turn. I have an appointment tomorrow morning with my OBGYN to get some cultures taken and have my blood tests ordered. I also have a dentist appointment tomorrow, so it looks like a fun day awaits.
Correction: My doctor and dentist appointments are on Thursday. That’s pretty bad when I don’t even know what day of the week it is.
Follow Up July 7, 2004
I’ve just returned from my husband’s follow up appointment. The doctor went back over the results of his surgery and why the reconstruction was not possible. We found out that the sperm that was retrieved during the surgery and subsequently cryopreserved, was frozen in only 2 different tubules. The doctor said they can refreeze the sperm if there is some left over after using them for IVF/ICSI. I guess they wanted to make sure that there were enough good quality, motile sperm in each tubule.
The doctor ordered the blood tests that my husband will need before we start IVF. My hubby will have those done tomorrow, and we should be able to get the results sometime early next week. I’m glad my hubby will not have to have any more tests, surgeries, etc. after tomorrow, but that makes it official that we’re moving on to IVF. No more appointments with the urologist = no more chances that we can avoid the trying world of IVF.
I came home from the appointment and cried on the bed. It’s just hard. Then I treated myself to one of these for breakfast. Not so healthy, but definitely yummy.
My kitty still isn’t doing too well. We’ve been giving him his medicine (which he detests) but haven’t seen too much improvement in him. He still won’t eat. I hope he gets better soon. It hurts my heart to see him sick.
Tough Day June 29, 2004
I’ve had a rough day today. I finally just broke down and cried. I hadn’t really allowed myself to mourn the fact that my hubby and I will never have children “the old fashioned way.” Up until his surgery, there was always still that possibility. I cried a little on the day of the surgery, but I really hadn’t had a good cry. Well, all of that pent up sadness had to come out sooner or later, and the fact that I am totally PMSing just helped things along.
I guess my frustrations don’t really stem from the fact that the whole sex to procreate thing is out of the question. It’s just that we have to jump through so many hoops. The waiting for the appointments, the never ending tests, the referrals, the requests for medical records, it’s just all such a pain in the ass. Not to mention the fact that we’re going to have to fork out $13-15K when we still have multiple tens of thousands of student loans to pay off (think 2 undergrad degrees and a very expensive private law school degree).
Plus there’s the looming question, “What if we go through all of that to do IVF and it doesn’t work?” It’s a distinct possibility. Everyone wants it to work on the first try, but the reality is that it doesn’t for the majority of people. I think it’s important to have backup plans. Last night my husband and I discussed our backup plans in case IVF #1 fails. Up until a little over a week ago, IVF was our backup plan. Now it’s THE plan. We’ve decided that if our first cycle fails, we will do a FET if we are lucky enough to have any embryos frozen. If not, we will decide whether or not to do another fresh cycle based on the results of cycle #1. Who knows, maybe the sperm that they retrieved during the surgery will be duds. Maybe I’ll have egg issues. There’s just know way to know until we try.
If we decide not to continue with IVF (after however many cycles) we will move on to adoption. I do not view adoption as a “last ditch effort.” I think adoption is wonderful. I don’t even have a problem with the whole lack of biological connection thing. I really don’t. I’m actually kind of scared for my offspring to inherit some of my genetics. I just feel that I need to try IVF first. Adoption will still be an option for us in 5, or even 10 years (not that I plan on waiting that long). My eggs will not be in as great shape in even 1 year. Age is on my side right now, and I’ll take any advantage I can get, no matter how small that may be.
So, I guess it helps some to plan ahead (as much as possible). Some days are just harder than others to look towards those plans in a positive light.
On the Road to IVF June 25, 2004
As promised, I will now elaborate on my attempts to get started in the IVF world. My hubby and I had already discussed our options if his surgery was not successful. We’ve decided to move on to IVF w/ICSI, as this is our only option to have biological children together.
So, this week I’ve been trying to get a consultation appointment scheduled. After doing a little more research on the two IVF clinics that my husband’s doctor recommended, (I had already looked at the various places to do IVF in Houston) I called the first one. This is also the facility that is storing the sperm retrieved from the surgery, so I thought it was logical to start with them. Well, I got the total run around treatment. I spoke to 4 different people, in as many phone calls, and got no where. In order to get the simplest questions answered, like cost, tests required, etc., I was told I would have to schedule an appointment to speak to a nurse over the phone. This, of course, was not a free service.
Well, I got frustrated with that place and decided to give the other place a call. This was the doctor that my hubby’s doctor had highly recommended. I had not considered this practice before due to the fact that it’s not one of the “biggies” in town, and it is not as convenient as some of the others. After looking at their numbers, I realized that they do plenty of cycles per year, and their success rates are actually higher than the first place I called. Plus, the whole IVF process is pretty inconvenient when you think about it, so what’s an extra 20 minute drive anyway. When I called this second clinic, I was immediately impressed. The person I spoke with was so helpful and courteous. She let me know what tests my husband and I would each need that we hadn’t already had. She let me know that the Dr. would be out of town for 3 weeks beginning July 5th and offered to schedule a consult appointment on June 30th if I could get a referral from my OBGYN before then.
I called my OBGYN’s office to try to get a referral, and that whole experience just stressed me out. I just needed to find out if it was possible to get a referral in time, but I ended up speaking to 3 different people in 2 days with no real answer to my question. My husband and I discussed it, and we decided it wasn’t worth the stress to try to get a referral and a copy of both of our medical records in a weeks time. So, I called the IVF clinic back and rescheduled my consult appt for July 28th. That will give us both time to get the required blood tests done and get the whole referral thing figured out. When I called back to reschedule, I was again impressed. I was treated so nicely, and the lady offered to put me on their email mailing list and send me a new patient information packet. We won’t know for sure if this is the place for us until after we meet the doctor, but so far I have a good feeling.
The Gory Details June 24, 2004
I guess I should actually get to posting about the events of the last few days. My hubby had his surgery on Monday. We arrived at the hospital at 8:30 am for his 10:30 surgery. We sat in the waiting room for an hour before anyone got to us. We then paid our copay and got to go to pre-op. They did all the standard stuff: IV, vitals, consult with the anesthesiologist, etc. Right around 10:30, they wheeled him off to the OR.
The doctor had told me that someone would bring out the extracted sperm around noon for me to take over to the other facility for cryopreservation. Well, noon came, 12:30 came, 1:00 came, and I was getting very nervous. Finally at 1:30 my husband’s doctor came out to talk to me. He let me know that they were far from done, but he wanted to give my an update. Here’s what I jotted down after we finished speaking:
1:30 pm My husband’s doctor just came out to give me an update. He found a blockage low in the vas deferens and a secondary blockage in the epididymis. Not good news. He said that they’re going to be able to retrieve some good sperm and that it will be ready for me to transport in about 45 minutes. After the doctor finished explaining the technical stuff, he asked me, “Are you ok?” I automatically answered “yes” but, in all honesty, I don’t really know. I’m sitting here in a hospital waiting room doing my best to hold back tears as some cute little toddler waddles past my seat. So I guess IVF here we come. Can’t say I’m all that excited about that thought.
I then went to the ladies room and tried to compose myself, and then returned to sit and wait for the sperm. It should have been ready around 2:15, but I sat nervously waiting for it until about 3:45. I was supposed to grab something to eat while I was out on this errand, but since I was still waiting, I didn’t have a chance to eat. That made things even worse. Here’s what I jotted down at 3:30:
3:30 pm I’m the only one left in the waiting room. There’s no sign of the sperm that was supposed to be ready at 2:15 for me to transport. I’m getting nervous. If that’s our only shot at having biological children, I sure hope someone hasn’t dropped the ball, so to speak. We already know that today isn’t going to be ending in the best case scenario. I just hope it won’t be ending in one of the worst.
One of the nurses finally brought out the sample for me to bring to the other facility for cryopreservation around 3:45. Here’s what I had to say when I returned to the hospital:
4:15 pm I’ve returned from dropping off the sperm. The other facility was close to the hospital, so it didn’t take too long. The people in the lab were expecting me, and everything went smoothly. When I asked if I had to pay then, they told me that everything was going to go through my husband’s doctor’s office. It should be interesting to see how much we end up paying for it.
At about 4:45 my hubby’s doctor came out to talk to me again. He let me know that they had finished the surgery, and it was unsuccessful. One side had blockages in both the vas deferens and epidiymus. The other side was open, but it appeared that that testicle was not producing sperm. They did a biopsy to find out what was going on with that testicle. They attempted to take the vas deferens from the side that wasn’t producing sperm and cross it over to the other side to bypass the blockages, but the blockages were too low to make that plan feasible. He let me know that he did retrieve good quality sperm from the epididymis of the productive side. I asked him his opinion of the various IVF clinics in town. He let me know of a couple of them that he recommended.
Just after I had finished speaking with the doctor, a nurse came out and let me know that I could go back to the recovery room. When I walked in there, it was obvious that my husband had only been out of surgery for a short time. He was barely conscious, but it was nice just to be able to sit with him. My first concern through all of this was to make sure that he came through ok. After sitting there for a while, my hubby started to wake up a little. The first coherent thing that came out of his mouth was, “Did it work?” It broke my heart. How could I tell him that he had gone through all of that and it didn’t work? I whispered to him that we would talk about it when he was feeling better and then sat down and cried. After he had woken up more, I did end up telling him that the surgery was unsuccessful. That was so hard to do.
We stayed at the hospital for quite a while until he was physically able to come home. He’s been recovering pretty well since then, although, as he puts it in his blog entry, “My groin looks like someone used it for a piñata and then stitched it back together as a baseball. Fun.” I’m glad his sense of humor is still in tact, and I’m doing my best to take care of him while he recovers.
This entry has turned out to be quite long, so I’ll save the saga about trying to move on to the whole IVF thing for another time. The only way to make it through this in one piece is to take it one day at a time, I guess.
Suckage June 22, 2004
My hubby’s surgery was not successful. He’s recovery slowly at home. I’ll elaborate more later, but I’m just not at the point where I can get all my feelings out there yet. I’m thankful that my husband is ok. We’ll figure out the rest later.
Take Me Out to the Ballgame June 20, 2004
Yesterday my husband and I went to an Astros game. We had a good time even though they lost. I was excited about the prospect of seeing Roger Clemens pitch, but I was not impressed. Apparently, he had a really off night and ended up getting pulled in the fifth inning.
After the game, Coke was giving out free cans of their new product, C2. It was better than I expected. I don’t drink carbonated beverages very often. They don’t really agree with me. I do, however, sneak in a couple of my favorites, Coke and ginger ale, every great once in a while. I’m not a fan of diet sodas, though, so I was interested to see if I would like the new C2. It wasn’t bad. It was basically a weaker version of Classic Coke. No chemically taste, like diet, but not really full-flavored like regular Coke. I guess for someone wanting a lower calorie soda, but not diet tasting, who likes something mild, this would be perfect
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Tomorrow is my hubby’s surgery. Apparently, when he called to confirm on Friday, per the pre-op instructions, the same lady that has frustrated us to no end in the past let him know that she had scheduled his surgery in the wrong facility. The hospital we’re using has multiple buildings. She managed to get it switched to the correct place, so now his surgery is at 10:30am instead of 10am. It’s going to be a nerve wracking day waiting for tomorrow to arrive. There’s so much riding on the outcome tomorrow. I guess only time will tell where we go from here.
Shouldn’t I Be Breathing Easier Now? June 15, 2004
Ok. I admit it. I’ve gone from ignoring my blog to not being able to shut up on it. I’m pretty sure it’s due to the large amount of nervous energy that is currently bottled up inside me. A lot of things that were causing me stress in this post have been resolved, at least partially, but I’m not feeling that much better.
I called the administrator lady that works in my husband’s doctor’s office this afternoon to follow up on getting the whole sperm cryopreservation thing figured out. She had me hold to speak to the actual doctor. This was a relief. We generally have much better success getting things communicated when skipping the middleman (or middlelady as the case may be). Anyway, I let the doctor know that the facility doing the cryopreservation needed an order from his office and a referral if he was going to order any tests. He said he would call the facility directly and get things set up. A little while later the administrator lady called me back to let me know things were all set to go.
My husband contacted our leasing office about our lease renewal. As a result, they are preparing a new lease that will be ready for us to sign by Saturday.
I emailed the ebay seller of the phones that I have yet to receive, because I was getting nervous after reading his new negative feedbacks. He emailed me back shortly thereafter to let me know that the phones had not shipped yet due to an oversight on his part. He apologized and promised to send them out first thing today priority mail.
My little brush with angular cheilitis has an end in sight. I think. It’s getting better thanks to some good old hydrocortisone applications. Thanks google for pointing me to a site that suggested this treatment. I don’t think I would have thought to use it otherwise.
Well, as you can see things are working out, at least for the time being. So why am I still sitting here curled up in a little ball totally stressing out? I’m sure it has something to do with the whole surgery thing. This one day (next Monday) will determine our whole baby-making future. I’m terrified. First and foremost, I want my wonderful hubby to be ok. Surgery is always a scary proposition. Secondly, I just want to know where we go from here. It’s just so stressful not knowing what the next step is. Will the surgery work, and we’ll actually be able to get to start “trying” again? Will the doctor be unable to complete the reconstruction due to a secondary obstruction, and we’ll have to go straight to IVF? Will the surgery only seemingly be a success, and we’ll have to turn to IVF after “trying” without success for 6-12 months? God, I wish I knew. The best I’ve come up with is just to hold my hubby tight and try to make it until Monday.
I Hate Red Tape June 14, 2004
I will be so glad when I don’t have to deal with all the crap that goes along with my husband’s surgery. I called the facility that will be doing the cryopreservation of the sperm retrieved at the time of the surgery to verify that they had received the order from my husband’s doctor. They had not. I called the lady that handles all of the scheduling for my husband’s doctor (the same woman that caused me so much stress in scheduling the surgery in the first place) and she said that the order hadn’t been faxed yet. Yeah, I knew that much. She said to call her back tomorrow when the Dr. would be in the office. She is absolutely no help at all.
I then talked to the secretary of the surgeon that will the assisting my husband’s doctor, since I hadn’t received a referral/approval thing from our insurance for that doctor. She gave me info that totally contradicted what the letter from the insurance said. I really don’t know what to do about that situation.
I also tried to call the leasing office of our apartment complex, because our lease is expiring at the end of the month. Their line picked up, but all I heard was two people talking to each other. Then I was disconnected. I have since delegated that task to my hubby. I’m just too frustrated to try again.
I’m also stressing about my most recent ebay purchase. I bought some new 5.8 gHz phones about a week and a half ago. At the time I bought them, the seller had excellent feedback, but since then he has receive two negative feedbacks from people that have purchased the same type of item. One person claims to not have received their purchase after 3 months. The other claims that their item wasn’t shipped until 11 days after payment was made and that the seller threatened them with bad feedback if they complained. I’m really careful about who I buy from on ebay, especially when buying something expensive. I realize that buyers are protected from fraud through credit card companies and through paypal, but it still makes me nervous. I just want my phones. I want to have one less thing to worry about.
I have another source of stress right now. Apparently I have angular cheilitis. For the past couple of weeks I’ve had this crack in the corner of my mouth. It hurts a lot especially when eating, laughing, or just opening my mouth in general. Last night I googled “cracked lip corner” and found out what it was. I’m really hoping to get away with not having to go to the doctor, but who knows. Just one more thing, you know.
Well, I’ve just reread this post, and I sure am grumpy. I guess it’s my prerogative to bitch and complain on my blog, but I’ve noticed I’ve been doing a lot of that lately. I wish I could just cheer up, but I don’t think it’s going to happen, at least not anytime soon. I’m a worrier by nature, so right now I’m feeling overwhelmed. I really hope that in a week most of this will be settled. My hubby will be having his surgery next Monday, so hopefully all that goes along with that will be resolved. On the other hand, depending on the results of the surgery we could have a whole other set of things to worry about. Ok. I just need to stop now and hope for the best.
Side note: I’ve always thought prerogative was spelled perogative. Apparently I’m not the only one.
Dream a Little Dream June 13, 2004
I have weird dreams. Last night I dreamt that we had to do IVF. This has been on my mind quite a bit lately, because that is our next step if my husband’s surgery is not successful. However, this was not a typical IVF cycle. The only details I remember from the dream are that instead of how they typically transfer embryos in an IVF cycle, my Dr. had me put on a patch (like the heat patches you use for menstrual cramps) that contained my embryos. I guess they were supposed to burrow through my skin into my uterus to implant. Interesting.
On another note, my mother called me last night practically insisting that she come into town to be there during my husband’s surgery. I had already told her that it was not necessary for her to make the trip. I guess she didn’t get the polite suggestion earlier, so last night I think I repeated the word “no” a million times. I guess for some people the prospect of sitting by themselves in a hospital for 8+ hours while their spouse is in surgery is not ideal. I, however, would much rather be alone. My mom would just stress me out. This is something that I feel my husband and I need to do on our own. Hopefully my mom gets that, but most likely she just got upset because I don’t “need” her. I just think all of this is hard enough to deal with without having to worry about dealing with my mom.
Anti Blog June 8, 2004
I’ve been pretty anti blog the last few days as evidenced by my lack of posting. I haven’t really seen the point. Even now, I’m having trouble getting words out. I’m at the point where I really don’t want to talk about the whole infertility thing, but I can’t stop thinking about it 24-7. It rules my life. I wish it didn’t, but that’s just how it’s got to be for now.
I’m just so mad at “it” whatever “it” is. Can you be mad at infertility? I guess I’m just pissed that this is my (our) lot in life. I know things could be so much worse. I really do get that, but this is what’s overwhelming my view of the world right now. I think I’m passed the whole “why me” way of thinking. I know that things have never been easy for us. We’ve always had to work really hard for the important things. Sometimes I rationalize that by thinking, “That’s the price we have to pay for having such a wonderful love-filled marriage.” Most people deal with some type of hardship at least once in their lives, some are lucky and just glide through life, but some people just have to fight and fight and fight. Will it be worth it if we end up being parents after going through all this crap? HELL YES.
Even though I’ve been pushing so hard to get my husband’s surgery scheduled as soon as possible, on some level I’m actually dreading it. I just don’t want to learn that they’ve discovered that they couldn’t complete the reconstruction once they’ve gotten in there. I don’t want my husband to have to go through all of that only to learn that there’s nothing they can do. I know I should be sitting here thinking positive thoughts, but in reality, I’m bracing myself for that letdown.
If the doctors are unable to complete the reconstruction, we’ll move straight to IVF. I guess that would be preferable to the reconstruction being successful but not resulting in sperm production. In that case we wouldn’t know for several (6-12) months, and it would delay our jump into IVF.
Best case scenario is of course a successful surgery followed by sperm presence followed by pregnancy. Our doctor said that the last patient he performed the same surgery on had his wife pregnant within 6 months. I don’t know what the exact odds of this happening are, but I know that they are very fortunate.
On a different note, we got our car back from the shop on Friday. It’s nice to have our own car back. It’s all pretty and dent free now. At least that whole situation worked out well.
You’ve Got Some ‘Splaining To Do June 2, 2004
I just realized that in quite a few of my recent posts I’ve referred to “my husband’s next surgery” without actually explaining what that surgery entails. Here’s an explanation:
In rare cases, obstruction of the male reproductive tract occurs in the inguinal portion of the vas deferens. Obstruction in this location is usually caused by an injury to the vas during inguinal hernia repair and should be considered in azoospermic men who have a history of previous inguinal surgery. Some of these injuries can be corrected by vasovasostomy performed in the inguinal canal, provided that the ends of the vas can be located and approximated without tension. Sperm retrieval and cryopreservation may be performed at the time of microsurgical reconstruction in order to avoid a second procedure in the event that the micro-surgical reconstruction does not reverse a patient’s azoospermia.
It’s basically a more complicated version of a vasectomy reversal. The hernia surgery that my husband had when he was 2 apparently gave him an inadvertent vasectomy. There’s no way to know until they get in as to whether they’ll actually be able to attempt the reconstruction. There could be a secondary blockage that they cannot get around. Even if they complete the surgery, it may or may not result in active sperm production. That’s why they are going to retrieve sperm during the surgery that will be frozen should we need to move on to IVF. I guess that clears everything up (or just makes things more confusing.)
More Progress June 1, 2004
The lady who I left a message for returned my call. She was so courteous and helpful. Apparently the storage fees for the cryopreservation won’t be covered by insurance but any testing they need to do on the sperm before freezing will be. The storage fees there are only $150/year. That’s cheap. We were told to expect $500-700. So now we just need to get an order faxed from the Drs. office and a referral submitted if the Dr. wants to do any tests. I then have to call and schedule an appointment to bring in the sperm. Oh, yes. I get to be the mode of transportation for the little guys. The Dr. will retrieve them at the beginning of the surgery, and I’ll bring them to the other facility while the Dr. finishes the reconstruction. It’s supposed to be a 6+ hour surgery, so I’ll have plenty of time. I just think it’s funny that they’ll be in my care. I could be carrying around the genetic building blocks to my future child. Weird, but in a good way.
Finally
We finally have a date for my husband’s next surgery. It only took two weeks to schedule. They’re going to do it on Monday, June 21st. So we just have to wait three more weeks (that is if they don’t reschedule it.) It is nice to have a date on the calendar, though.
The next hurdle is trying to arrange the cryopreservation of the sperm that the Dr. will retrieve during the surgery for possible later use in IVF. I called the facility that does this only to speak to someone who had no clue what I was talking about. At one point she said “you mean you need to make an appointment for a semen analysis?” Uh, no. She then asked, “What day do you want to bring the frozen sperm over?” I then asked to be transferred to the department that deals with this. I ended up speaking to someone in the lab. I had a little more luck with her, but when I asked about insurance coverage, she handed me off to someone else. That person then gave me the number of the person that deals specifically with the patients of the doctor that my husband goes to. Inevitably, I got her voicemail. Hopefully she’s a tad more efficient about returning calls than the lady I was dealing with before. I guess the fun never ends.
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